Little did I realise what an amazing influence Emily was going to have on our lives and change the way that I measured happiness, success and value friendship both new and old. Would i rather be the old me but with a new daughter, of course I would but I feel that now I have been pushed down this road, fate is trying to cut us some slack.
The momentum of Forever Stars is something that you only read about, to have reached over £30k in such a short time is amazing to think we still have to reach £100k is frightening! But with the support of you wonderful people who are walking alongside us on this pathway, I know we are going to achieve it and that next year families who lose a baby will have a haven to start their grieving process.
We have so much coming up in the near future, the family fun day is causing me huge concern, it will be the first event that we have held solely for Forever Stars and I really want it to be a success, not only for the charity but also for all the people that are going that extra mile to support us. If you can come down on Bank Holiday Monday to the Village Hotel in Nottingham, we would be so grateful for your support.
We have a series of fun nights out coming up in September and October, a curry night, a bingo night and the gala dinner all of these events have tickets available, in the main it is still Michelle and I who are co-ordinating things for Forever Stars, although we do have some great family and friends helping out on a regular basis. If you have contacted us and we haven't got back to you please keep with us, we will get there :)
On Sunday we held a surprise party for my mum who was 65 just days after we lost Emily, the party should have happened then but we couldn't face it, so I'm pleased that we managed to give mum a surprise that put a smile on her face, she has been an amazing support for us and yet has had to suffer watching us upset whilst at the same time have the grief of a grandparent. Whilst I enjoyed the party, i couldn't get past feeling that my little girl would be the belle of the ball if she were there and how proud I would be to take her round the family table by table.
Eight months might as well be eight seconds at times like the party, what a strange emotion grief is, time can ease the pain but it can't stop those moments when your emotions come to the surface and no matter what you are doing and where you are, you have to accept it still hurts so much.